My thoughts on the new year

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So many blogs talking about New Years resolutions, their thoughts for the upcoming year, verses etc…, it’s really got me thinking.  I think like everyone the beginning of a new year always gets me thinking about what lies ahead, and what lies behind.  I don’t do resolutions, but I do usually try to do a verse or theme sometimes.  Though I haven’t done one in years.  I do have a life verse, but haven’t done a yearly one in a while.  I have a thought of what my yearly theme/verses will be this year, but I’m still praying on it, so I’ll share them another time.

But looking back over the year I’ve realized all the many changes we’ve been through and how the Lord has watched over us through them all.  For those of you who don’t know, we moved to this town 3 years ago and Paul had a great job he really liked.  About 1 year into the job he got laid off, right before Thanksgiving.  It was a huge blow, but the Lord took care of us.  We had food left on our doorstep, money sent to us anonymously, and had one of the best holiday’s we’ve had.  Hubby took a job as a janitor at our church.  It wasn’t his life long goal or anything, but he knew he needed to do it, and the Lord provided it.  He loved the people he worked with and the Lord blessed us through it mightily.  That Christmas we were pretty short on money and such and I remember talking to the kids that the Lord would provide like He did the year before.  (Not for presents so much, but for our food and needs).  And I remember this distinctly, Sarah asked me, will the Lord give us food on our doorstep again and money in the mail anonymously again?  And I said, “Well He could, but I doubt it.  The Lord doesn’t usually do the same things the same exact way.”  Well, what does the Lord do?  He does the exact same thing as the year before, food on our doorstep & money in the mail.  hahaha  I loved talking to Sarah about the fact that we can’t always know how the Lord is going to meet our needs, but we need to trust He will.

Then this past January, after a year as a janitor, we knew it was time to make some decisions.  Would we stay in Idaho?  What kind of job does Paul want to do?  What was our next step?  We prayed, and he knew he wanted to go back to customer service, working face to face with customers.  That’s when we started looking at one of our local grocery store chains here.  We heard they had great benefits, and that it was a good place to work.  We prayed and Paul tried hard to get in the door there, but it wasn’t happening.  The only job offer we got was for a part time job, and that wasn’t acceptable.  We were bummed but left it in the Lord’s hands.  About a month later a friend called me at 10:15 at night, she was so excited.  She was at a bible study (the last one of the study) and a friend there was saying she was a manager of the deli at this store Paul wanted to work at, and she was looking for full time help!!!  Paul went in the next day.  It was the exact department he wanted, and the exact hours I wanted (no overnight).  But the pay was 1/2 of what we were making (and we had already dropped 1/2 when we moved out here).  We weren’t sure if we could take the job.  Actually we knew we couldn’t afford to, but we also knew that it’s exactly what he wanted to do.  We prayed, talked and prayed and the Lord opened the door for him to take the job.  We were blessed with the finances to cover us for a year, and we jumped in with both feet.

It took a while for me to get use to the ever changing schedule, which those of you who know me, know I’m a routine girl.  My routine was thrown out the window, and we all had to learn to embrace the time we had together and not be so stuck on the normal routine of how we got things done.  It’s been a learning curve all year, but the Lord has been with us through it all.  And now as 2010 has come to a close and 2011 has started we have found out that there is a small possibility of his hours being cut.  In about 3 months we will run out of the extra finances that got us through this year, and his pay hasn’t increased enough to cover it all.  But we are doing our best to trust in the Lord.  I don’t write any of this to act like we have it all together, believe me, we don’t.  We have our times of tears and fears.  Wondering how things will look in 2 months when the money runs out.  Wondering did we spend and save the way we should have this past year?  But yet I know in my heart the Lord brought this job to Paul.  I know in my heart it’s the job for my husband.  And I know that the Lord has never allowed us to go hungry.  Does that mean this coming year is going to be easy for us financially?  I haven’t a clue.  I don’t know what this year holds for us financially, but I know Who holds this upcoming year.  And that’s all I can cling too.  And believe me, when the tears, fears and worries try to creep back in, I’ll come back to this journal entry and re-read how the Lord took care of us, not because of anything we did, but because of Him.  And know that no matter what, even through the hardest times, we can cling to Him.  I pray I cling more than I let go.

So those are my thoughts with this upcoming year.  Sorry if its pretty heavy thoughts, but it feels good to get it typed out and re-read what the Lord has done for us.  I do have a hard time trusting Him, and it’s good to go over it all again in my mind.  Thanks for listening, or reading it with me.  Here is a collage of pictures I took this last year.Save

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